


I Think I'd Explode (If I Touched You)

by lezboidloser



Category: Raven Cycle - Maggie Stiefvater
Genre: Adam Parrish Loves Ronan Lynch, First Kiss, Idiots in Love, Love Confessions, M/M, Ronan Lynch Loves Adam Parrish, Ronan Lynch is Bad at Feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-11
Updated: 2020-08-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 07:20:20
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25839475
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lezboidloser/pseuds/lezboidloser
Summary: There are times where Adam doesn't know whether he wants to punch Ronan in the face or kiss him until he loses all feeling in his lips.
Relationships: Ronan Lynch/Adam Parrish
Comments: 12
Kudos: 186





	I Think I'd Explode (If I Touched You)

He would argue. He would. He's just too tired to entertain Lynch's antics right now. Adam's just finished locking up and closing Boyd's for the day when - ever the enigmatic, Ronan Lynch is is waiting for him outside, leaning against his BMW. 

Adam sighs, wiping his cheek with the back of his hand, "What is it, Lynch? Did Gansey send you? I already told him I'm not interested in his charity work."

Ronan snarls, "It's not charity, Parrish. But _no -_ Dick didn't send me."

"Then? I know you're not here because you enjoy my company. Out with it. I still have homework to do." 

Ronan kicks at the gravel beneath his feet, "Couldn't sleep."

"What do you suppose I do about that?" Adam questioned, his voice a mix of teasing and pure exhaustion, "Sing you a lullaby? Maybe a bedtime story?"

"You know what. Fuck it, I don't know why I even came. Fuck you." Ronan pushed himself off of his car, venom in his voice but no more than usual.

"Fuck you." Adam returned.

Just when Adam thinks his evening is through with taunting him in the form of raven owning, loud mouthed assholes, Ronan pulls up beside him on his walk home.

"Parrish. The fuck are you doing?"

He fiddles with the straps on his tattered bag, "Walking. What does it look like?"

Ronan scoffs, "No shit. Don't you have a fucking car?"

Adam sighs, "Shitbox's gone to shit, I'm afraid. It needs some repairs. I'm walking for the time being. Now, go find someone else to annoy, I've gotta get home." 

He didn't consider St. Agnes his _home._ It wasn't, not really. It was just some place he happened to eat and occasionally sleep. That didn't make it home. Home is wherever Henrietta _isn't._

"Aren't you a mechanic?"

"Yes. I see the irony. Please-"

Ronan stops driving, interrupting him mid sentence, "Get in the car."

There are times Adam doesn't know whether he wants to punch Ronan in the face or kiss him until he loses all feeling in his lips. Times he'd rather not acknowledge - times he doesn't have _time_ to acknowledge. Now is undeniably one them.

Had it been Gansey offering the ride, he'd tell him to drop dead. Blue - he'd feel safer in the middle of a tornado than in a car with her at the steering wheel. But it was Ronan. 

There was no pity in his voice. No malice. No questions. He was just making a statement. _Get in the car_ he said. Not a question or demand, it was more of a request than anything. Adam would argue, belive him - he would, but right now, he's too tired to say anything. So he doesn't.

He gets in the passenger seat and tosses his bag in the back. 

"Thanks."

Ronan nods and turns up the volume of the music humming throughout the car ever so slightly. Adam figures it must be radio music, because it's way too tolerable to be Ronan's.

The ride to St. Agnes is silent other than the faint droning of some ad trying to sell laser hair removal and crickets chirping out into unknown. Adam wonders if crickets ever sleep. He wonders why they feel the need to chirp all through the night. Maybe they just want to know they aren't alone in all of that darkness, that there's other crickets just as afraid and lonely as them. Or maybe it's just something bugs do. What the hell did Adam know about crickets?

When they get to St. Agnes Adam grabs his things out of the back seat. He means to say something like "thank you" or "goodnight."

It comes out as, "Come upstairs, Lynch."

In the same way Adam entered the car at Ronan's beckoning, Ronan exits at Adam's.

When they get to the apartment Adam almost immediately strips himself of his shirt and pants. Even at night, Henrietta summers can be a pounding to those without proper air conditioning.

As he's taking off his shirt he pauses, "Oh! Sorry uh you can take the bed. I'll-"

Ronan scoffs, "Shut up, I'm not taking your goddamn bed, Parrish." 

To be fair, it wasn't much of a bed in the first place - just a springy, uncomfortable mattress on the ground.

Adam nods, walking over to a busted up dresser he got at a yard sale a couple of weeks back. "Here." He hands Ronan a blanket quilt thing. It's not very comfortable, but what did he expect?

"You're sleeping in that?" Adam asks, seeing as Ronan's still fully clothed, leather jacket, boots and all.

He raises his eyebrows but other than that, Ronan's expression doesn't change, "You have to pay to see me strip, Parrish."

Adam laughs, it's the first time he's laughed in a while. A long while. 

Tossing Ronan a pillow, he turns over and switches off his lamp.

"Goodnight, Ronan."

"G'night, Parrish."

After about 20 minutes of trying to find a comfortable position, Adam evens out his breathing, pretending to fall asleep. Of course Ronan sees through it.

"Go to bed, Parrish." he grumbles.

"I could say the same to you."

"I told you, " Ronan says in a way that sounds like defeat, "I can't sleep."

"Scared of nightmare dreams?" Adam asks.

He hears Ronan shift, blanket russling and floor boards creaking, "No. I don't dream bad shit when I'm around you."

Thankful that the lights are off, Adam smiles to himself, "Lucky me."

"I lied, earlier." Ronan concedes.

Adam huffs, "You don't lie."

Ronan shifts again, his hesitation tangible, "I lied. I did come here because I enjoy your company."

There it is. Adam's known. Of course he has. All the stolen glances and the practiced disinterest. Nobody's looked at him the way Ronan has. Not Blue, not anyone. The thing is, Adam's never looked at anyone the way he's looked at _Ronan_ either. Not Blue. Not anyone. But Ronan Lynch isn't someone to play with. The rush Adam feels when he makes him smile, even if it's only a little bit, the way his chest feels like it's caving in when Ronan's hand brushes his. Inside jokes and tiny declarations of love through hand cream, through letting go long enough to let yourself be hauled in a shopping cart at way too high of speeds to be safe. Crash.

It's either love Ronan Lynch wholly or not at all, and there isn't a single cell in Adam's body that isn't dedicated to the subtle worship of the boy currently on front of him.

Adam sits up, turning the lamp on, "How come you've never kissed me?"

Ronan closes his eyes, if this is a dream he doesn't want to wake up, "Do you want me to?"

"Do you want to?"

Ronan could laugh if he wasn't scared any sudden movement would cause this to end, "Don't. Don't ask me questions you already know the answer to, Adam. You know you find that to be patronizing."

"Then?" He's feeling bold. Maybe it's the sleep deprivation, maybe its the way Ronan's cheeks are flushed red or the way he's anxiously chewing the inside of his mouth.

"I-" he begins, "I think I would explode. I don't think I could stop."

Adam leans foward, grabbing Ronan's bracelet covered wrist, "I don't think I'd want you to stop."

In that moment, Ronan surges forward capturing Adam's lips on his own. It's Ronan's first kiss, he thinks. Adam is Ronan's first kiss and he can't help but feel a sense of accomplishment. A sense of pride. He's never been so proud to kiss someone.

At some point Ronan's made his way onto Adam's bed, hunched over as he kisses this boy senseless. For a first kiss, it wasn't so bad, but he was probably biased.

They spend god knows how long sat there, making out on Adam's stupid matress, taking breaks to breathe every so often.

Adam catches Ronan's lips with the palm of his hand, "Ronan. Ronan. I have school in the morning. Lynch, I'll kill you if I fail my chemistry test tomorrow." 

He wouldn't fail, they both knew that.

"I told you, " Ronan said between kisses, "I wouldn't stop."

"I'm not going anywhere, Lynch. I'll still be here tomorrow, but for _now,"_ Adam pushes him off, much to Ronan's dismay, "We sleep."

"Promise?" Ronan asks, voice just above a whisper. It sounds so sad and broken that Adam can't help but pull him back into another kiss, this time softer and reassuring. 

"I promise."


End file.
